What are you crying about?

In Less than 10 days I will be leaving everyone I know in Maine behind. In less than 10 day I will be trusting the home that I love to the care of a stranger. I have to tell you... I'm a little stressed out....

Yes, I know that the Lord will take care of us. Yes, I know that things will all work out for good for those that love him and are called according to his purpose. But...

We have painted, packed, stored and thrown out and it still looks like I have at least a months worth of work to do. Every room that looks done is quickly demolished by the Jackson Clan. The garage needs a good hose down. The backyard needs a good raking and the wooden window sills and railings needs a good polishing.

So, where did I end up on a Sunday night? In the corner of my bathroom where no one could see me (unless they came all the way in), on the toilette (lid closed), facing the corner.

I just wanted to cry, not because I was sad, angry, panicked or annoyed. I just needed to cry. It felt great, I muffled my sounds and let it out...(sigh).

Unfortunately my loving, caring, compassionate but always looking for a reason to laugh at me husband walked all the way in. He asked “Are you crying?” I cleared my throat and answered in a very nonchalant kind of way... “No...”

“Yes, you are... Why are you crying?”

“I'm not...”

“Marj!”

“I'm not crying! I'll be out in a minute”

Now that he was pretty sure that no one had died, he came right over and proceeded to struggle with me so that I would let him stare me in the eyes. I fought through laughter to try and get him to leave. Didn't work, I was a ball of mush with red eyes and a runny nose and was now laughing and

play-fighting with DH. He couldn't help but try to “fix” my anxieties. “Don't worry” he says. “I got this, I will handle it, you just relax”

Yeah, well who's going to finish all of the laundry and match all of the socks?!?

Good grief, can a girl just cry for a good hour or two? Sheesh...

I am anxious for this season in the move to be over. I am ready to be living in Costa Rica not worrying if the house will be ready before we leave. I am ready to be done with the transfer of the care of our dogs to their new owners, knowing that they are happy and secure.

Will these things ease all of my worries? Probably not, but they would sure help!

I will cast all of my cares upon the Lord who gives me strength!

Moral of the story... Cry if you want to cry, let the snot run, look in the mirror and laugh at yourself then cry some more.... just lock the door!

More to come...